Hello my beautiful friends I do hope I find you well and happy new month. I love August it’s truly a breath of fresh air although its hella windy at least winter is over. Today I want to talk about finding the love of your life on the internet. Do you believe in finding your match online, using dating apps or even merely bumping into each other on popular sites such as Twitter, Intsagram and Facebook? We are living in a virtual world that is constantly changing and new apps are being birthed on a regular basis that seek to bring us closer together across the world. Love is literally everywhere in the virtual world. You get to find your custom bae online. For example if you want a tall lanky guy who is blue eyed, educated and independent, he is a click away.
What then matters or is of concern is compatibility, are you compatible with this your type. Is your type also in search of someone like you? We find ourselves romanticizing the whole aspect of finding someone perfect online and we take away the realistic expectations of any relationship, we become ignorant to the possible flaws of the other person. We might be picture perfect online but are we compatible physically? Are we able to hold a conversation in real life? What if he or she has certain mannerisms that I cannot stand in real life? Do these serve as the ultimate deal breakers? Because to be honest when you are conversing online you try to sell yourself to the other person as impressionable as possible in order to be easily liked or loved. Don’t worry it’s nothing personal it’s just part of human nature.
We find ourselves concealing our weaknesses so that we can be labelled beautiful, lovely, intelligent, happy and all that. We hardly share the bad and ugly with our potential partners simply because we want to uphold a certain image that allows us to be in this person’s life in the long run. But are we really doing ourselves any good in all this façade? Fast forward to meeting someone physically, they actually like your pretty eyes that they said they like online they actually think you are still as handsome as you portrayed online. But they don’t like the way you talk, your voice is too squeaky, they don’t like that you are rude to the waitress or that fuel attendant.
All of these things you concealed for the obvious reason that you would end up being sad and lonely with no one to take care of you in the long run. You could not mention that you have an anger problem because who in their correct mind would want to be with someone who is angry most of the time. The virtual world gives us that temporary immortality that enables us to hide our weaknesses. We become very good at hiding our flaws and blemishes to the world that people around us fall in love with a lie. I mean who has posted online having a tantrum or a meltdown or an anxiety attack and actually glorifies it? Literally no one because no one wants to see that dark side of anyone. We are all guilty of creating a bubble and walking on egg shells in the name of pleasing the one we think is desirable and worth having. The irony is that in return we are the same people responsible for bursting our own bubble when the weaknesses surface and we are unable to hide them.
Finding true love is more than possible it is the in thing but there are conditions to it. You need to be as honest with yourself as possible you need to be someone who really knows what they want and how they want it. When you love yourself you will find yourself in the arms of the one most deserving. You become honest with your potential partner letting them know as time progresses your flaws and what makes you furious. We all have that and it be stupid to act all goody goody because that is just plain suspicious. Ladies let him be in love with those stretch marks, stop editing your face too much they want to see the real you they love that. If they don’t then they are not yours because when they meet you in real life you don’t have that snapchat filter it’s just you, with no edits no what. Don’t make them expect to see a light skinned woman yet you are beautifully dark like Lupita Nyongo.
Instead raise that bar and own your true self. Remember you are perfect with those flaws, those stretch marks, that gap tooth, that dark complexion all of that. That is what makes you powerful and that is what makes you unique that is where your power lies. Don’t waste your time trying to look like Kim Kardashian, sis she is already taken, be you and love the person that you are and you will see the world falling hopelessly in love with the real you. The people that need to love you will love you just the way you are, no edits nothing just you. I am pro love I love love. Don’t be afraid to try finding the love of your life online just be careful on who you confide in because there are also a lot of catfish out there that is people who steal identities and pretend to be other people.
Be vigilant be wise but above all open your heart to new possibilities and don’t be afraid to love, to try and to risk wisely. Love is all around us and it cannot be contained so don’t be narrow minded instead be open minded and try this new age way of meeting and dating people. Don’t be left out and also don’t be pressured to do so. As in anything it may not be your cup of tea and that’s fine too.
I hope you enjoyed reading this post and don’t forget to like and share. Until we converse again love you lots and thank you for your precious time. Tell me your views too on online dating in the comment section below. I’ll be delighted to join in the discussion.
You know leaders are readers right? If you didn’t know now you know. I am currently reading a phenomenal book by Don Ruiz called The Mastery of Love. This book is an amazing reading, it explores self-love and loving relationships. It is a definitely a must read. Get yourself a copy its amazeballs.